|I loved becoming an aunt!!|
Other babies suddenly didn't matter. The only one I actually wanted to snuggle with was my own.
Even to this day, I think babies are wonderful, precious gifts and I am excited when a new one enters the world, but I don't have that longing feeling to get my paws on them and taken in their wonderful baby scent like I used to. Yes, when you have a new baby, I am going to come visit it and love on it. I'm just saying that at the end of the day, holding a brand new baby does not awaken an unquenchable thirst in me like it did before.
In fact, I would take a hug and a kiss from my little Levi over a baby snuggle any day. I love that kid so much.
That being said - as much as Herb and I talk about expanding our family, I don't have a burning desire to have another baby. Some days I think it sounds fun, but most days I think sleeping for 8 solid hours at night sounds like more fun. I guess I am a little concerned feeling like if I wanted to have more babies, I would know that now. And I'm not convinced I do. Wishy washy is the perfect term to describe me right now.
I'm sure if we were the baby making type this decision would be easier - heck - at that point it could just happen accidently and my mind would be made up for me.
In all fairness, this uncertainty could be my own defense mechanism knowing that there is no financial or logistical way for us to expand our family right now. If I was hard core longing for baby at this point in my life, I would be up a creek without a paddle.
Either way, I know that our family planning is not in our hands, which is refreshing. If God wants us to have more kids, I think he'll make it clear, and give us some direction on how to make that happen. In the meantime, I am going to just enjoy my little guy.
Please weigh in on this - did you always know that you wanted to have more kids? Did round two just hit you out of the blue and make you decide? Or did you feel wishy washy about the size of your family?