Spit Up On My Sweater

Dear Levi -

The days are going too fast.  Every time I lay you in your crib, I'm a little sad that it means one more day has passed.  I just want to freeze time right now.  I know when you start to crawl, and talk, and run, I will be so excited for those milestones, but for now, everything is just plain perfect. 

Today I took you to the mall for the first time.  You were starving in your stroller, so after I finally got you to settle down and managed to mix your formula with one hand, you only ended up drinking 2 ounces instead of 7 or 8.  You were SO enthralled by all the energy and people to see at the food court.  You were so excited by all the lights and sounds, you didn't even care about your bottle (which seems to be your only vice these days).

You're getting a little too big to be held chest to chest in the baby carriers.  You want to see the world!  Facing forward, legs and arms totally free, you know you are secure against me, your back to my chest, and you kick and flail your arms as if you're running a marathon.  I am so delighted by your energy, I just can't stop hugging you when you're kicking like that.  It's the cutest thing ever.

Last year at this time your dad and I were just waiting...waiting to start officially waiting.  It was one of the most miserable periods of my life.  How things have changed in a year.  I cried a lot last Christmas, but I cry more now.  Of course, these are a different kind of tears. I see you smile and me and make your "shy" face, and I just can't believe you're ours.  The other day I cried 5 times - just looking at you.  Tears of joy, son.

Today's date is the one that tops our homestudy approval, one year later. I'm so happy on this approviversary I hear soft breathing from your crib and smell your spit up on my sweater.

I love you Levi. 

Comments

  1. I was a mess the first two weeks that Roman was home- I would hold him close and just sob because I was so happy and loved him so much that I just couldn't process all of the emotion. I still have those moments now. And at least twice a night after we've laid him down to sleep I have to steal a glance at the little boy sleeping peacefully in his crib. Because I just want to remember it forever.
    Thank you, God, for little boys.

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  2. I agree with Lauren's "Thank you, God, for little boys" comment. I also get overly emotional about how much I love my baby boy, and often "miss" him while he's napping. Every day is a wonderful new adventure in our home... I can't imagine life without him. :) I am so glad your Christmas tears are happy ones!

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