I Love the Number 12: May

You know how when you have a blog, sometimes you set up all these rules and expectations for yourself, and then get frustrated when you don't follow through, but then your realize your mom and her sister are the only ones reading your blog anyway?  Well, that's how this number 12 "series" has been for me.  I'm thinking, "What I am really trying to accomplish or prove with this series?"

Well, while there are no magical powers in the number 12, once a month, on the 12th, I am taking a hot second to reflect on someone or something important and special in my life.

So on to this month.  Today is May 12.

In America, today is the day before Mother's Day.  Go buy the cards, take your mom out for dinner, prepare your house for a picnic tomorrow, you know, the norm.  But in a small group of America called "The Adoption World," today is Birth Mother's Day.

I don't necessarily need a special day to remember how amazing and special Levi's birth mother is; I think about this every time I hear Levi's voice say "Mommy," and feel those little hands grasp the back o my neck in a tight hug.

But sometimes I do need a reminder to TELL Jen how loved and treasured she is.

Last Mother's Day I mourned for her more than I rejoiced in my first Mother's Day.  Time has healed many wounds and in the last year we have grown much closer, which is wonderful for everyone involved.  We had so much fun having dinner together and watching the kids play (and fight, ha ha!) together last night in celebration of this very special weekend.

There is no framework for the way this relationship should go.  How will this all unfold, what does it look like fiver years down the road?  None of these questions I can answer.  All I can do is be grateful.  Grateful to be able to give Levi his past, and grateful that Levi's past will be part of his future.  Grateful  that my son has so many people who love him so much it hurts.

I found a poem this week that describes Jen perfectly...

Almost crumbling to the ground, she stopped.
Looking at how far she had traveled and all it had taken to get her there,
She recognized her strength.
The strengths she had inside of her,
The strength she had gained along the way.
And so, she stood up.
Standing tall, she faced forward and continued on.

If this doesn't describe the wonderfulness that is Jen, I don't know what does. Don't worry, I did tell her, too.  Actually, I told her with modge podge and scrapbook paper (if you get my drift).  

Happy Mother's Day!!


  1. I feel yah on the whole "only your sister and mom read this"... I'm Sarah V.'s friend I love reading your blog about adopting Levi. I've been reading since before you became his mom. some of your posts are so good i cry;-) and I never knew about the day before mothers day, day.


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