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Friday, October 31, 2014

Leave

October 31 is finally here!I feel like I just finished training for a 5k and now I've crossed the finish line, except with a lot less muscle ache.  In fact, this 31 Day writing exercise has been incredibly therapeutic for me - especially in a month filled with drama, sickness, weariness, and loneliness.  Thank you for sticking around, reading, commenting, sharing, encouraging.   My 31 Day commitment was providential, and for that I am grateful.

I love a name with nick-names. I always used to think Elizabeth was the best name because there are SO many nicknames to be had - Ellie, Liz, Beth, Lizzie, Eliza, etc.  This made it a little disappointing when we named our son Levi.  Levi is four letters, it has no nick-name.  But, alas, I LOVE the name Levi, so I wasn't going to be deterred by the lack of nick-names.

But lo and behold, they still happened.  Lee.  Schmevi.  Lovee.  And even Leave.  

Leave - what a weird name to be called, but it happens, actually quite often.  Sometimes Schmevi even turns in to Schmeave.

When I read the writing prompt word today, I thought not of exiting or the singular word of the plural form of the things falling from the trees.  I thought of my Leave.  This kid is my everything.  I love the way he hugs now that he is child size (not baby-sized).  His arms wrap around my neck and squeeze tightly as he plants  a sweet kiss on my cheek.  He nuzzles his face into my neck and shakes it back and forth really fast.  He calls it a snuggle.  When he reaches for my hand, we hold whole hands now, not just fingers.  The other day, I realized that I am more used to the feeling of Levi's hand in mine than Herbs.  This is endearing, but it reminds me I need to hold Herb's hand more, too.


His questions spill out of his mouth at an alarming pace.  Why did that happen?  Why do you think that happened?  Who made that happen?  Who made that?  Why did God make that?  The questions are endless, but Herb reminds me that this is how Levi learns about the world.  Herb is so patient as a daddy.  He answers every question completely, intelligently, leveling with the four year old.  I can hear him explaining the different between our physical heart and the heart that wants to love people and do good things as I type.
He is our little news man and theologian.  Completely fixated on the rocket explosion that happened Tuesday night, he had to stay in from recess at school on Wednesday because he was too busy telling the class every detail about the rocket fire and didn't finish his work.  Last month, he corrected his teacher on the presence of the Trinity in heaven - when someone asked if God and Jesus both live in heaven, the teacher answered yes, and Levi said, "Actually...they are the same person."


Come to think of it - my little Leave is actually a little Herb.

I have been so blessed in the last ten years.  I have fallen in love twice and that love has been returned to extremes I will never be worthy of.  These two are the reasons I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I can leave everything in God's hands.  He has been so faithful.  He always will be.


Trust in the Lord with all your heart.  Lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your path straight.

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